Wait for a Man who…

…is a place of rest and refuge.  [Song of Solomon 2:3]

3 Ways To Ruin Your Teenager’s Understanding of the Gospel.

1. Teach her how to identify and avoid “sinners”.

If you have successfully taught your teenager to identify and avoid “sinners”, then you are raising a self-righteous pharisee. (Matthew 23:13) You’ve taught her to become judgmental. (Matthew 7:5) If you teach your teenager to avoid the “bad people”, then she will assume that she is good.  This ruins her understanding of the gospel because she refuses to deal with her own sin.

2. Insulate and protect him from sin.

You cannot protect your teenager from the reality of sin. You must LET GO and allow him to be exposed to sin’s power and consequences. Now, before you send a rebuttal, I am NOT saying that you should be the tempter, or the one who teaches them how to sin. What I am saying is that you cannot be a hovering parent forever. What steps have you taken to protect your teenager from the “world”? NOTHING you do can save them from the power of sin. ONLY Jesus can save them from this reality. (1 John 2:2)

If you continue to insulate and protect your teenager from the reality and effects of sin on our world, then he will never truly understand the fullness of what Jesus did for him on the cross. This ruins his understanding of the gospel.

3. Neglect to apologize, confess or repent from your own sin.

(1 John 1:8) Do you, as a parent, ever compromise your integrity in front of your teenager? Do you ever lie about something small in front of your kid?  Do you gossip in front of them? Do you brag about your accomplishments? Are you a single mother who is sneaking around with your boyfriend? (This is exactly what you teach your teen not to do)  Are you a Dad who has outbursts of rage and anger without apology, confession, or repentance?

Trust me on this. Your teenager is watching YOU.  If you never confess or repent from your own sin, but you still attend church and pretend to be spiritual on Sundays, then your teenager will be CONFUSED about christian living.  This ruins their understanding of the gospel because they will believe church attendance is the road to salvation. Or worse, they will see that you are a hypocrite and reject your fake religion.

Devil’s Advocate

Earlier today, I was reflecting on a period of my life that I’m not so proud of…I call it my “devils advocate” period.

I’ve been involved in ministry at various levels since I was 16 years old. There was a time when I thought I knew everything about ministry, theology and church methodology.  I had read a bunch of books, attended a lot of conferences, and brushed up against some fairly influential church leaders. I thought I knew it all.  I had gained a ton of exposure, but had little experience. My ministry experience was equivalent to that of a third grade karate student… just enough knowledge to get my butt kicked!

This particular stage in my development as a young adult is not my favorite to reflect on. I allowed my attitude to sour toward leadership. I would argue just for the sake of arguing. And I found more pleasure in sharing my opinion than in reaching lost people.  I would always defend the counterpoint in discussions with other church leaders about their ideas.  I loved pointing out flaws in other’s thought development.  I was ANNOYING.  I was a real jerk sometimes, too.  Occasionally, someone would call me out on my behavior. And I would usually respond by saying, “Oh I’m just playing the devil’s advocate.” As if that made me less annoying.

This is what I wish someone would have said to me back then:

The devil doesn’t need a freaking advocate. Period. God will not use your arrogant, cocky, prideful attitude. Stop arguing with your inexperienced opinions and get on board with what God is doing in your local church and through your leaders.  If you can learn to submit to your spiritual authority as opposed to subverting them, then maybe…just maybe, God will give you influence and favor.

Backed Into A Corner

2 Principles I am learning regarding finances and ministry.

1. If we are obedient to God’s vision for our ministry, then we will always feel like we are being backed into a corner financially.

It’s just a spiritual reality.  God’s vision is ALWAYS bigger than my budget.  As a ministry leader, I’ve learned a couple of things. If I allow my budget to determine my vision, then I am listening to money, not God. Money is an intimidating obstacle for ministry success, and if we allow, it will restrict us.  God is the opposite.  He wants to encourage, comfort and set us free.  I’m NOT saying a ministry leader should be careless with money.  But I am saying that if it is God’s will, it is God’s bill. The king gets what the king pays for.  So when I am listening to God for vision, I have to know that he will provide.  Period.

On another note,

2. If we are disobedient to God financially, then we will always feel like we are being backed into a corner spiritually.

That’s a spiritual reality, too!  God does not need our money.  But he requires our obedience.  And when we are not obedient to him in our finances, then we will find ourselves backed into a corner spiritually.  If we are disobedient in the area of finances, then our church will not grow or accomplish the vision God has given us.  However, when our church leadership, volunteers, and members are obedient to God in the SMALL things (tithing and generosity), then we will see an over abundance of resources to accomplish the LARGE vision that God has given us.

I don’t know about you, but I want to see God do something LARGE here in Apex!

Play Through The Pain

Imagine that you are an athlete.  Your team has had an uneventful season, you barely have a winning record, and your personal stats are just good enough NOT to get noticed.  Today is game day.  You are playing in a particularly average game on an average day. You are not the All-Star, MVP, Heisman candidate, or crowd favorite.  Just…average.

On this particular day during the game you get hurt. Your wound isn’t dramatic, it’s not a broken leg or a concussion, but nevertheless you ARE hurt.  You are NOT debilitated, however you are experiencing enough pain to cause you to ask yourself, “Is it worth it?”  ”Is this game worth my pain?” You have the choice to continue playing, or to seek comfort and attention. If you choose the latter you would be totally justified because, after all, you are hurt!  In this moment, you have a decision: Play through the pain, or go to the sidelines.

One of the greatest decisions you can ever make in this life is the decision to play through the pain.

Over the years I have learned two principles:

1.  When you show people your wounds, you will receive SYMPATHY.  You’ll get band-aids, massages, attention, care, love, and support. You’ll be the center of attention, people will pander to your needs.  There will always be someone who is empathetic toward your situation and wants to nurse you back to full health.  The crowd, coaches and players will understand, but they will also say, “I wish he/she was not hurt, we could use their abilities on the field.”

Alternatively,

2. When you play through the pain, you will receive HONOR. Others will see that you are hurt, and they will see you playing anyway. This inspires people, and it proves to the audience that you LOVE the game.  People will respect you for that. Other wounded people will FOLLOW you.  You’ll get voted captain.  Your leadership and influence will increase.

Your decision to play through the pain just might be the most pivotal decision of this season in your life. You can be a wounded VICTIM, or a wounded WARRIOR.

In your marriage, career, ministry, church, family, friendships, relationships, and any other area this applies, make the decision to PLAY THROUGH THE PAIN.

It’s worth it.

Bringing Sexy Back pt 1

Here are some of the insights I shared with our students last night at Generation 1:9 regarding marriage.  Some may ask, “why are you teaching junior high and high school students about marriage?”  Because statistics say that more than 50% of them have watched their parent’s marriages fall apart.  If we don’t teach them otherwise, they will follow their parent’s example.

Plus, I refuse to spend 6 weeks teaching them rules for dating. We tried that in the 90′s. Rules don’t work. VISION works. Students won’t follow rules or set boundaries for their relationships unless they understand WHY the rules and boundaries are important.  So last night I made my first attempt at a sermon about marriage.  Here are some highlights:

1. Marriage is NOT easy.  It takes COMMITMENT.  Love is not a feeling, it is a decision.  Marriage requires a decision to never quit, ever.  In our society, dating has become more like “divorce practice” than “marriage practice.”  The cultural expectations for your dating relationship are equal to a pretend marriage (in thought, emotion, and behavior).  We’ve adopted a “drive before you buy” mindset.  Then if you don’t like it, you quit.  It starts around the age of 12, and you do this over and over again until you are finally at an acceptable age for marriage.  By the time you get married (around age 26), you have already divorced numerous times.  In today’s culture, people are entering marriage after having already been through multiple divorces.  It’s no wonder the divorce rate is so high, you have been practicing how to separate and divorce since you were 12 years old!

2. Your marriage is the best sermon you’ll ever preach. Marriage is an illustration of the gospel.  The Bible often refers to God’s relationship to the church as that of a groom and a bride.  God is the groom, we are the bride.  Marriage is a representation of that.  Ephesians 5 says husbands should love their wives as Christ loved the church.  That means that husbands should be willing to lay down their lives for their bride.  Marriage is a great picture of how Jesus loves us! I encourage all girls to go for a man who like Jesus.  I tell them NOT to settle for a loser who isn’t even willing to lay down the video game controller (much less his life) for them. One of my goals over the next few years is to raise up a group of young men who understand how special our women are.  I want to teach our young men how to be men like Jesus.  I hope that 10 years from now I get to officiate the marriages of couples who grew up in this youth ministry.  And my prayer for them is that they would have Godly marriages that are a clear picture of the gospel.

3. Catch the foxes.  Song of Solomon 2:15 says “Catch for us the foxes, the little foxes that ruin the vineyards…” The fox represents decisions, vineyards represent your marriages. Some of you are making decisions right now that are ruining your future marriages.  What are they?  What decisions are you making that you might potentially be ashamed to tell your future wife or husband?  If you catch the foxes now, you will have a healthier and more productive vineyard.  I encourage you to make decisions today, with your future marriage in mind.  The CHARACTER that you build NOW is the same character that you will take into your marriage.  If you don’t catch the foxes now, you won’t catch them later.  And the truth is, if you don’t make decisions now with your marriage in mind, you’ll end up as just another statistic.

More Ministry, More Criticism

More Money, More Problems

At my previous job, I was a commission only salesman.  If I sold the product, I got a paycheck.  If I didn’t sell anything, I didn’t get a paycheck.  Sometimes I made big money, sometimes I didn’t.  For the most part, everything was variable: income, expectations, budgets, allowances, sales production…everything.  However, there was ONE thing that was constant.  This one thing was true no matter the variables:  When I was making more money, it meant that I had more customers and, unfortunately, this meant I would have to deal with more complaints about our services.  Eventually, a co-worker and I adopted the phrase, “more money, more problems.”

Truth is…

Truth is, this happens everywhere, in every industry.  The customer service center of department stores at the mall are always busier during the holidays.  Local restaurants deal with more upset customers during their busiest hours of the day 12-1 and 6-8.  Technology providers take more customer phone calls just after the release of new products. Hotels and Hospitality companies have more issues during the peak of travel and vacation seasons.  In almost every industry, there is a reliable constant…more money means more problems.

What I’m Learning

I am learning that this is a reliable constant in ministry, too.  The only difference in ministry is that it’s not all about the money.  I believe it’s a spiritual principle… “More Ministry, More Criticism.”  It seems like when God is doing something great, it stirs up lots of different criticism from various sources.  I’m still catching on but I think I am noticing a trend.  When I preach about subjects in youth ministry that could have the BIGGEST impact on a teens life, it makes people uncomfortable.  As a result I find myself responding to lots of emails and questions.  I guess it’s something I’ll have to learn to live with.  In the meantime, I am loving the opportunities to meet people and go deeper in relationships with families.

Another phrase I use to describe this spiritual principle is:  ”Big Impact, Big Feedback.”

Baptism

Baptism is not…

1. A public profession of faith.  (Nowhere in the Bible is baptism described as a public profession of faith.)

2. A milestone to be “attained” or “accomplished” along your spiritual journey.

3. A means by which you are “saved.”

4.  A grand finale of one’s salvation.

Baptism is…

1. A step of OBEDIENCE after salvation. Other than salvation, there are no “pre-requsites” for baptism.

2. SYMBOLIC of your complete surrender to the purposes of God in your life.

3. Represents the BEGINNING of a new life, cleansed, and set free from the power of sin.

Spontaneous Baptism

3 Thoughts for Generation 1:9

1. YOU are the most amazing group of young people in this city!

No, seriously, I mean this!  You guys keep bringing your friends to Generation 1:9, and you keep being transparent with one another in small groups.  You are on fire!  I love it.  I’m telling you, if you keep this up God is going to reach all 20,000 teenagers in our area through YOU.  You WILL change Apex.  No doubt.

2. YOU have to BRING your friends to this last week of the Sun Stand Still message series.  It’s going to be LEGIT.

I am praying for a large group of students to be saved this weekend.  20 to be exact.  Will you pray that with me?  I am going to invite everybody I know!  Will you?

3.  I can’t wait to see you again!

Other than Jesus and my wife, I probably think about and pray for you more than anyone else I know.  I love you!  Seriously! I always look forward to Sunday because I get to spend time with you.  Thanks for being who you are and for being madly in love with Jesus.  You inspire me!

What does a youth pastor make?

1. We make teenagers re-evaluate everything.

Is your outward appearance really that important?  Do you seriously think seeing him is the most important part of your day? Does their opinion of you matter? Do you have a vision for your future?  What steps are you taking to accomplish that vision? What has God been saying to you lately? Where do you see yourself in 5 years? What scholarships are you applying for?  Are you settling? Do you really believe your parents don’t understand what you are going through? What? When? How?

2. We make parents LET GO and HOLD ON TIGHTER at the same time.

“It’s just a season, I promise.” “Don’t blame yourself.” “It’s not your fault.” “TRUST God’s process” “TRUST your child” “When is the last time you had one-on-one time?”  ”If I were you I’d search the bedroom before the school bus gets home.” “Read your daughter more than the news.” “Are you dating your wife?”

3. We make you laugh on your worst day.

4. We make room for you when it feels like nobody else will.

5. We make adults see teenagers for who they really are. (We also make teenagers see adults for who they really are.)

6. We make a pizza party sound like a steak dinner.

7. We make you angry sometimes.

8. We make one generation take chances that the previous generation didn’t.

9. We make you quit stuff because other things are more important.

10. We make you stick with it even when it gets tough.

I am sure some of us make more, and others make less.  But for the most part, we all make an impact.

Excuses. Excuses. Excuses.

Luke 14.

16 Jesus replied with this story: “A man prepared a great feast and sent out many invitations.17 When the banquet was ready, he sent his servant to tell the guests, ‘Come, the banquet is ready.’18 But they all began making excuses. One said, ‘I have just bought a field and must inspect it. Please excuse me.’19 Another said, ‘I have just bought five pairs of oxen, and I want to try them out. Please excuse me.’ 20 Another said, ‘I now have a wife, so I can’t come.’

One man’s excuse was “stuff to do.”  Another man’s excuse was “stuff to try out.”  The last man’s excuse was a relationship. What’s your excuse?

Lately I’ve seen people allow all kinds of other things to take the place of their relationship with God.  They either have stuff to do: work, vacations, projects around the house, etc.  Or they have stuff to try out: boats, memberships, sports, recreation, etc.  OR they have some new relationship that takes priority: girlfriends, boyfriends, new baby arrival, marriage, etc.

Are you allowing any of these things to take priority in your life?

Jesus has prepared a great feast, don’t let ANYTHING stop you from getting there.

The Uphill Battle

“Let the Sun stand still over Gibeon, and the moon over the valley of Aijalon.”  -Joshua 10:12

This is a fascinating story of how God stops the sun (literally stops time!), so that Joshua can have more time to defeat the Amorites.  It is an amazing miracle, however, it was a downhill battle.

In verse 10, Joshua attacked the Amorites from High ground.  He and his army were at the top of a mountain when they surprise attacked the Amorites who were camped at the bottom of the mountain.  Joshua didn’t win this battle because of strength, he didn’t win because of numbers, not because of talent, or weaponry, or skill.  Joshua’s army won because of their battle POSITION.  They were in the right position to win.  In fact, the ONLY thing that could stop them from demolishing their enemy was TIME.  That’s why God made the Sun Stand Still.  For the most part, it was an easy win.  God had their back and they had the high ground.

THE REAL BATTLE was actually the uphill battle in verse 9.  It was a 25 mile march across rugged terrain with a 4,000 ft. ascent.  An entire army made this trek in roughly 10 hours.  It was like having a youth lock-in, except there were no video games or sleeping bags…it was an all night walk from Apex to Chapel Hill!  Then, after a long night and a painful climb, they were EXACTLY where God needed them to be.  And that’s why they won.  They actually won the battle during their 4,000 foot uphill march to the peak of the mountain.

The problem I find with many of us is that we want God to show up, but we don’t want to march to the top of the mountain!  We want the MIRACLE without the MARCH.  We want the WIN without the WORK.

The uphill battle is when you are up at 1am studying for that final.  It’s when you are awake at 5am running on the treadmill.  It’s when you stay late after practice and shoot 100 free throws.  It’s when you spend your last $10 to take her out for ice cream.  It’s when you eat pb&j in lieu of steak to pay off debt.  It’s the uphill battle that separates the men from the boys.  The uphill battle is where national champions are born. The uphill battle is proving ground for a downhill victory!

Whatever you do, win the uphill battle.

Empty Jars

2 Kings 4

3 And Elisha said, “Borrow as many empty jars as you can from your friends and neighbors. 4 Then go into your house with your sons and shut the door behind you. Pour olive oil from your flask into the jars, setting each one aside when it is filled.” 5 So she did as she was told. Her sons kept bringing jars to her, and she filled one after another. 6 Soon every container was full to the brim! “Bring me another jar,” she said to one of her sons. “There aren’t any more!” he told her. And then the olive oil stopped flowing.

There are people all around us who are like the jars in this story. They are empty. They may be filling their lives with countless things (relationships, accomplishments, money, stuff, etc), but they have never been filled with life in Christ.  The good news is God loves our emptiness.  He loves to fill empty jars.

God wants to fill our emptiness with his spirit!  In the Old Testament, olive oil is symbolic of the Holy Spirit.  In this story we learn that the oil continues to overflow out of the jars until there are no more empty jars left to be filled. If we bring empty jars to him, he will fill them!

I want to encourage you to begin gathering empty jars and bring them to God.  Maybe you are the empty jar.  Perhaps you have friends who need to filled with life in Jesus.  Invite them to Generation 1:9 this weekend!  Go, gather all the emptiness you can find (in yourself or in others) and bring the emptiness with you THIS Sunday night.  When we bring him our empty jars, he will pour himself into us!

Go find some empty jars and bring them to God this Sunday!

3 Reasons why Generation 1:9 is LEGIT

Hey Generation 1:9, here are 3 reasons why I believe YOU are LEGIT!

1. Desperation.  You are desperate for God.  You WANT TO and WILL see God change the world right before your eyes.  Your sense of desperation is unmatched by any other group I’ve seen.  I know that God has you exactly where he wants you – desperate for a move of God!  For this reason, you are LEGIT!

2. Sacrifice.  You continually inspire me with your personal sacrifice!  Some of you have quit jobs, rearranged your schedules, committed to doing homework early, re-prioritized your life, etc, just so you can be a part of what God is doing in and through Generation 1:9!  I love it!  Last night, more than 50 of you (almost half) left your shoes (good shoes, not old ones!) at the church and went home barefoot because you are committed to making personal sacrifice for the glory of God!  Unbelievable!  (BTW, the youth room smells like feet today!)  For this reason, you are LEGIT!

3. Submission.  Your commitment to listening to God and obeying him is remarkable.  I am humbled by your submission to God.  I know many of you who are committed and are doing EXACTLY what he has called you to do.  You have followed his leading to start clubs in your schools, start Bible studies with your friends, give money to those in need, etc.  You are living your lives in a posture of submission to God and that will NEVER get old to me!  For this reason, you are LEGIT!

I love you Generation 1:9!  The best is ahead!  Let’s reach this city!

Orlando

I spoke twice on Sunday, once in the afternoon to the “young people” (ages 15-30) and then again to the church that evening. During the 3 hour break between services, I met a young man and wife who had walked nearly 5 miles to get to church.   She was pregnant.  The local missionary offered to drive them home.  So, I rode in the back of the truck with the guy (Orlando) and Whitney rode as a passenger in the truck with his wife.

Orlando and I are about the same age, we’ve both been married for the same number of years, and I would say our personalities are quite similar, too!  However, our circumstances are dramatically different.

There are roughly 1 million Haitians in the Dominican Republic.  Many of them have moved here as a result of the earthquake in 2010.  Orlando is one of them.  He lost family in the quake, and is now forced to start a new family here in the Dominican Republic.  He is unemployed, living day to day off of less than $1 per day.  The cost of a gatorade here is 40 cents.  That means he makes enough money to buy 2 gatorades per day.  Sadly, many of the Dominicans will not hire him because of his Haitian heritage.  He is fighting an uphill battle.

Tragically, that is the story of many of the Haitians here in the DR.  This truth is more real to me now because of a 15 minute conversation with Orlando in the back of a truck.

I have so much to be grateful for…

“Dios te bendiga”

“Dios te bendiga”

“God bless you”

I have never handed out Christian tracts to strangers.  Except for today.  This morning, I was handed a stack of tiny booklets which explained the gospel in espanol and french creole.  Then, the local missionaries taught me one sentence, “Dios te bendiga.” Apparently, that was all I needed to know in order to be prepared for short term missions work.

I was far from prepared.  I don’t think anything could have prepared me.  I’ve seen films, heard stories, read books, and looked at pictures.  But as I waded through an open air market in the slums of a third world city – I realized that nothing could prepare me for the poverty, sickness, or chaos that I was encountering.

I stared deep into the eyes of men, women, children and even stray dogs.  They all returned with stares of excitement and curiosity because I was “Americano.”  However, I could still see the despair and pain that they held within.  Unfortunately, the only thing I could offer them today was a christian booklet and a simple statement, “God bless you.”

…I hope he does.

I Refuse!

7 Things I REFUSE to do!

1.  I refuse to allow my circumstances to define my character.

2.  I refuse to ignore unsaved people in order to keep religious people happy.

3.  I refuse to allow my  income to dictate my work ethic.

4.  I refuse to allow another person’s motives or agendas to hijack the vision God has given me.

5.  I refuse to accept criticism from anyone who doesn’t love me and want the best for me.

6.  I refuse to let gossip alter my perceptions of other people.

7.  I refuse to settle for anything less than God’s BEST in my marriage and ministry.

Thanks Coach!

Criticism hurts.  That’s why they do it. Critics like the feeling of power and/or control over you.  Nothing gets under my skin more than a critic who “knows it all” but does nothing about it.

Critics are like referees.  They don’t play the sport, but they are quick to blow a whistle and tell everyone if they don’t like something you did.

Critical people are like referees.  They will criticize you.  Tell you when you are wrong.  Make calls. Blow their whistle. Get lots of attention.  And they will ALWAYS leave you when the game is over.  They don’t care about YOU.  They are there for the short term.  Referees constantly change all season long.  They don’t follow you, travel with you, or care about you – they just show up and blow the whistle.

That’s why you should ALWAYS choose to be thankful for your coaches. Your coaches care about YOU.  Coaches practice with you, travel with you, check up on you, love you, and want the BEST for YOU.  Find a coach in your life.  Find somebody who has your back, rides home with you even after you lose, and ALWAYS has your best interest in mind.

Today I am thankful for my coaches.

Don’t Just Stand there!

Acts 1:8-11

“ 8 But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes upon you. And you will be my witnesses, telling people about me everywhere—in Jerusalem, throughout Judea, in Samaria, and to the ends of the earth.” 9 After saying this, he was taken up into a cloud while they were watching, and they could no longer see him. 10 As they strained to see him rising into heaven, two white-robed men suddenly stood among them. 11 “Men of Galilee,” they said, “why are you standing here staring into heaven?…”

It’s sad to say, but a large percentage of church goers today are doing exactly what the apostles were doing in verse 11…simply STANDING THERE.  Doing nothing.  Going nowhere.  Just waiting for Jesus to come back. They attend church on Sunday, pray before meal time, and occasionally whisper sweet nothings to Jesus before falling asleep at night. These people are often viewed as incredibly spiritual.  They hang out with their pastor, lead Bible studies, run Christian businesses, give lots of $$ away to charity, and are very involved in their church.

Like the apostles, we all need to be reminded of what Jesus commanded of us…”TELL EVERYONE ABOUT ME.” Sometimes it’s easy to forget that our mission requires immediate action. And it took two random guys in white robes to remind the apostles that their mission was urgent.

So, like one of the guys in the white robe, I am asking you, “Why are you standing there?”

Why do you stand beside your co-workers at the coffee bar and never mention the name of Jesus?  Why do you stand beside your family members at the hospital in the midst of crisis and neglect your responsibility to share the hope you have in Christ? Why do you stand in front of your employees to give a motivational talk during your weekly meetings but never hint at your relationship with the creator of the universe?

Why are you standing there?

Youth For Something

I speak with people every week who are “church shopping.”  Many of these people are new to town, others are just getting back into church, but MOST of these people are contemplating leaving a church they already attend.  With various explanations, good or bad, people decide to leave their churches every day.  The explanation I hear most often is, “my other church doesn’t have much for the youth.”  As a youth pastor, I hear people talk like this all the time.  They ask questions like, “do you have something for the youth?” or they’ll say, “we are looking for a church that has something good for the youth.”

At first glance, these statements don’t sound bad.  Sounds like well intentioned parents who want the best for their kids. However, I believe those statements are indicative of an unhealthy mindset that has crept into the culture of many churches. Churches today think they’ve done their job by providing “something for the youth.”  Parents choose the church their entire family will attend based on the “something good for the youth” philosophy.   I disagree with this mindset.

The last thing I want to do is provide “something for the youth.”  I am more interested in being a facilitator of “youth for something.”

“Something for the youth” looks very different from “youth for something.”

If teenagers are disinterested in the things of God, it’s probably not because there is nothing great for them. More than likely, it is because we haven’t inspired them to live for something great.  We try to convince them to follow rules, behave, attend church events, etc.  We’ve given them a lot of ways to live, but have we given them something to live for?

I hope we can begin to see a shift in church culture.  One where youth leaders quit trying to provide “something for youth,” and begin doing what it takes to convince their youth to live “for something.”  More particularly, “youth for God, youth for their schools, youth for their friends, youth for their church…youth for something.”

Poor Widow

“While Jesus was in the Temple, he watched the rich people dropping their gifts in the collection box.  Then a poor widow came by and dropped in two small coins.  “I tell you the truth,” Jesus said, “this poor widow has given more than all the rest of them.  For they have given a tiny part of their surplus, but she, poor as she is, has given everything she has.”

I’ve probably read this story hundreds of times during my 15 years as a Christian.  It has never actually hit home with me ’til after my wife and I recently discussed the story.  I’ve always pictured the widow as an old lady named Mabel wearing old clothes, listening to old hymnal music, driving an old Cadillac Deville.  The reason I have always pictured her as being an elderly lady is probably because children’s stories depict her that way.

However, the Bible never says she was old.  It says she was a poor widow, but not an old widow.  What if she was a young widow?  Would that make the story different?  Perhaps she was young, and recently lost her husband, sending her into a financial crisis and eventually losing everything.  What if she had much and lost it all?

Now the story changes.  She is a YOUNG widow who had MUCH but LOST it all, and is still making the decision give generously.

There are 2 things that I am learning from the poor widow:

1. Your financial LOSS should never cause a decline in your GENEROSITY.

Generosity offsets the heartbreak of your losses.  Have you recently experienced a great loss? GIVE.  Are you struggling to make ends meet? GIVE.  Are you feeling anxious, depressed, or concerned about your financial status? GIVE.  This is your opportunity to be like the poor widow.  If you give more during your greatest time of need, then your anxiety will be redirected to others instead of your situation. You’ll find that your anxieties can be healed through giving. Try it.

2. Don’t fall into the trap of believing that you will be generous when you have more.

Generosity doesn’t come just because you have more.  Generosity is built into your character.   It is a part of who you are, and is not affected by your circumstances.  If you are generous person, then you will give regardless of your circumstances.  And, like the widow, Jesus will notice you when you give during your time of greatest need.

Personal Suffering

I believe God is preparing me to suffer.  I don’t know why, when, or how – but lately God has been broadening my understanding of personal pain and tragedy.  It seems that, as I’ve been reading the Bible, the stories of personal suffering jump off the pages and slap me in the face.  I am learning that if I truly want to be more like Jesus, then I have to be willing to share in ALL of his life experiences. What types of suffering did Jesus endure?  His father probably died early in his life, his cousin was beheaded, one of his closest friends denied him, and another friend sold him out for some silver.  Additionally,  Jesus was betrayed, mocked, criticized, rumored, targeted, schemed against, and crucified. Jesus endured personal pain, sacrifice, and suffering.  Interestingly, Jesus’ personal pain is what led to God’s ultimate gain.  Jesus’ suffering led to the resurrection!

This is what Paul says, “I want to know Christ and experience the mighty power that raised him from the dead. I want to suffer with him, sharing in his death, so that one way or another I will experience the resurrection from the dead!”  (Philippians 3:10-11)

If you want to experience the power that raised Jesus from the dead, then you must also endure the pain that put him in the grave.

I have a feeling that if I am going to make a difference in the world, then a difference has to be made in me first. I don’t know how to explain this, but for some reason I think God wants me to have a good understanding of pain before I experience it. Lately, my life has been easy. I have not experienced much personal pain.  But I know I am not immune to tragedy.

Maybe when that day comes I will have a healthy understanding of how my pain can eventually lead to God’s gain.

Grow Up, Get a Job, and Take Responsibility

The Gospel is for everyone

What is the Gospel?  Who is it for?

Is your gain worth the sacrifice?

Are you frustrated with your life?  Are you unsatisfied in your marriage? Are you unsettled in your relationships? Do you have trouble convincing yourself that your career choice is the right one?  Are you discontent with your income?  Are you tired of driving around in your beat up, junky car?  Do you want an upgrade in your life?  If any of this describes you, then you should continue reading…

Beware of the temptation to make reactionary life changes because of your discontentment with current circumstances. You will see something that is not yours and assume that it is everything you want…then you will be tempted to make a trade that looks good from a distance but is VERY costly in the long run.

For example, I drive an old car.  It has almost 200,000 miles on it, needs a new oil pan, has one headlight, the leather seats are ripped open and it is missing gas tank cover.  I often laugh because, as a youth pastor, all of my 16 year olds are driving nicer cars than me!  I am not satisfied with my ride.  HOWEVER, when I consider buying a new vehicle I have to ask myself… ”Is my gain worth the sacrifice?”  If I were to get a new car I would have a car payment due every month and my insurance premium would triple, costing me more than I can afford.  So I’ve decided that the gain (new seats, gas cap, oil pan, etc) is NOT worth the sacrifice ($$).

I am reminded of two brothers from the Old Testament, Jacob and Esau.  Esau traded his birthright to Jacob for a bowl of soup. He was hungry for a moment, and in his discontentment – he sacrificed all of his inheritance for the temporary satisfaction of a full stomach.  And people have been doing this ever since.  Sacrificing a LOT, only to gain a little.

I’ve seen dads uproot their entire family and move to another city for a job promotion or $10,000 raise. They sacrifice a solid church home, stable family environment, and their children’s long time friendships for a raise.  Is the gain worth the sacrifice?”

I know a woman who cheated on her husband for a man who was cuter, showed her more attention, and listened better. She sacrificed her reputation, friendships, family relationships, and her career as a church leader. She sacrificed much, what did she gain?

I know a student who cheated on a test.  He had already completed the entire test by himself and knew that he would probably score a B+. But he wanted an A.  So he cheated on just a few questions to try to earn a few more points.  He was caught looking at someone else’s test and was given an F on his.  He sacrificed a B+ in an attempt to earn an A.

I’ve seen too many people make decisions as a reaction to their discontentment with circumstances.  Next time you want to make a decision as a reaction to your circumstances, you should ask yourself, “Is what I already have too valuable to lose?”

Is your gain worth the sacrifice?

CRAVE: A Controlled Rave

Raves have become extremely popular in our area and can attract anywhere from 600 – 1000 teenagers per event.  Raves are fun for dancers, but can be very dangerous because of the prevalence of  drugs, alcohol and over-age predators.

I recently landed on a concept to host a “controlled rave” as an outreach to the teenagers in our community. This will be an outreach to those who are already attending these all night dance parties and submitting themselves to the dangers of substance abuse and other dangerous practices.  The idea is that we will beef up the security, hire police officers, have an age policy (19 and under) and keep the environment safe for the teens in the community who are already raving.  If teenagers are going to do this, I’d rather them do it under our supervision.

So…we are going to host CRAVE: A controlled alternative to Raves.  This will be our first attempt at an event like this so we are taking extreme measures to ensure safety for the youth in our community.

This event is going to be held at Hope Chapel from 7pm – 11pm on Saturday, May 14th.  We are bringing in the most popular DJ in the area, AudioRush.  We are expecting between 150 and 200 teenagers to be at CRAVE.

Please be in prayer for us for 2 things:

1 – That we are able to reach teenagers who are far from God.  We don’t want this to be “just an event.”  We are doing this with purpose, and vision.  We want to have exposure to the masses of teens who would never step a foot into a church otherwise.

2 – Pray that we can endure criticism well…pray that we can see beyond controversy and into the spiritual realm.  I can’t expect to host a rave at a church and not be criticized for it in some fashion.  I can imagine that both Christians AND non-Christians will have question marks on their face regarding Crave.  We are definitely stepping out on a limb by hosting this rave.  Stepping out on a limb normally ends one of two ways: the limb will break and the fall will hurt…OR the limb will hold and the discovery will be tremendous.  I’m praying for the latter.

-Bill

Good Friday?

Earlier this week they were praising him shouting, “Hosanna!”  They were reaching out to him, pointing, and fighting for his attention.  He had celebrity status. They called him “King” and “Savior.”  It was all good. But things have suddenly changed. Today they will murder him. Today is “good” Friday…the day we killed God.  It is the day we commemorate the brutal death of an innocent God-man, Jesus.

How can we call this day “good?”  Is murder good?  Are angry mobs good?  Is making fun of, spitting on, or screaming at Jesus good?  Is corrupt leadership good?  If you really think about it, this was not a good day for anyone. It is one of the most embarrassing days in history. The trusted religious authorities who were supposed to have it all together arrested and murdered the son of God.  It was not a good day…it was tragic!

So…why do we call today “good Friday” if it was a day of such terrible suffering and tragedy?

Sometimes the “good” isn’t found in the moment – it is only found in the fruit from the moment.  In this case, Jesus’ suffering lead to our salvation.  His suffering is in the moment.  Our salvation is the fruit from the moment. We do not call it “good” Friday because Jesus died.  We call it “good” Friday because his death gives us LIFE! It is the fruit from the moment that is good.

Perhaps you are suffering today.  Maybe you have recently been abandoned, hurt, ignored, devastated…you are lonely, confused, depressed, anxious…perhaps those closest to you have hurt you.  You’ve recently experienced a divorce, family feud or a break-up.  You feel like nobody cares.  You are suffering.

If you could choose one word to describe your day today, it definitely wouldn’t be “good.”  Heck you wouldn’t even describe this past month as “good.”  The same principle that applies to Jesus also applies to you, sometimes the “good” isn’t found in the moment – it is only found in the fruit from the moment. You are suffering in the moment.  And it is NOT good.

I believe there will be a day when you see fruit from this moment.  Your hard times today are shaping YOU and building your CHARACTER for tomorrow.  One day you will see the fruit from today’s suffering.  I am praying that one day you will look back at your most severe time of hardship and say that it was “good” because of the fruit from that suffering.

Make today your “good” Friday…regardless of your circumstances…

STORYTELLERS – beginning May 15th

Our stories define us. They tell of the places we’ve been, the things we’ve experienced and the potential that God has for our lives.  Hebrews 10:23 says we should “hold tightly without wavering to the hope we affirm.” One of our goals as a youth ministry is to allow every senior the opportunity to share their personal testimony with the rest of their peers before they graduate high school.  This will encourage each student to identify and communicate what God has done in their life before they go to college AND it will also be an inspiration for the younger  generation to pursue God.  This 4 week message series begins the week after Mothers day on May 15^th.  Be on the lookout for your favorite Hope Chapel Senior because he or she may be sharing their story soon!

Summary of Sunday

Bad things happen to everybody.  People will hurt us, friends will let us down, circumstances will cause us grief.  Nobody is excluded from the pain of being offended, neglected, left out, mistreated, wronged or sinned against.  Everyone will have to endure emotional suffering on some level.

“Life doesn’t serves us lemons.  In life we ARE the lemons – and we get squeezed.” Each of you can point to circumstances in your life where you feel as though you have been squeezed.  Some of you are currently experiencing bad circumstances, unhealthy relationships, hurtful friends, etc.  You feel like you are being squeezed.

1 Samuel 19:9-10

“9 But one day when Saul was sitting at home, with spear in hand, the tormenting spirit from the Lord suddenly came upon him again. As David played his harp, 10 Saul hurled his spear at David. But David dodged out of the way, and leaving the spear stuck in the wall, he fled and escaped into the night.”

David experienced the squeeze.  In his case, it was the person closest to him (His own King) that hurt him.  The person who he was supposed to be able to trust the most, hurt him the most.  It was the person who should have protected him that exposed him.

Perhaps that is your story…someone who you trusted betrayed you.  The person who you least expected to turn against you has said hurtful things, spread rumors, and made you their enemy.

You are experiencing a squeeze.

The question is, “How do you respond to the squeeze?” The way you respond to your circumstances is telling of your character.

How does David Respond to the squeeze?

He runs into a cave – 1 Samuel 22:1-2

1 So David left Gath and escaped to the cave of Adullam. Soon his brothers and all his other relatives joined him there.2 Then others began coming—men who were in trouble or in debt or who were just discontented—until David was the captain of about 400 men.

Sometimes when we are offended, hurt, attacked, let down, etc…we run to a CAVE. Your cave is not literal.  You run to a cave of bitterness, resentment, and unforgiveness.  Nobody will come get you out of our cave. You have to choose to leave the cave.  Some people never leave the cave and they die in it.  Don’t die in the cave.  Forgive those who hurt you.

Conclusion

-Jesus was brutally murdered for no reason.  He didn’t deserve his pain.  Yet even in the midst of his unfair execution, he prayed that God would forgive the people who were murdering him.

-When Jesus rose from the grave he gave you the power to come out of our cave.

Discussion Questions

1. What stood out to you the most about the message on forgiveness today?
2. Tell about a time in your life when you felt like you were being “squeezed.”  How did you respond?
3. What do you think is the best way to avoid the caves of anger, bitterness, resentment, unforgiveness?
4. Think of a person you know who may have run into a cave because of how you treated them…how should you act toward that person now?

Giving Day

The Next Generation Part 2

I wrote my previous article with the intention of highlighting the positive characteristics of our senior generation.  I kept it clear, concise, and positive because blasting them for their sin is typical of writers in my generation. I don’t want to be typical.  I want to honor those who came before me.  As I said in my previous article, we are a generation that lacks honor.  We highlight the sin of our predecessors so much that we ignore our future and our potential legacy.

We focus so much on their sin that we ignore our own sin.  We highlight what they did wrong so much that it causes us to ignore the good things that we are supposed to be doing. We can be better than that.

We have become a generation that is known for what we are against rather than being known for what we are for.  Instead, I want our generation to be known for what we loved and for the good that we did – not known for what we hated, disagreed with and abstained from.

That’s why I choose to honor instead of criticize our senior generation.

The Next Generation

Lately I have been deeply troubled and discouraged by a large disparity between the current “senior” generation and my own generation (Generation X).  In the past year, I have attended 5 funerals of men and women who were older than 65.  I have learned much about life, character, integrity, and work-ethic by hearing their stories and participating in their funerals.  What I am learning from the senior generation causes me to question my own generation’s values, purpose, and legacy.  The word that continually comes to mind when contemplating this generational disparity is “CHARACTER.”

My heart aches when I compare my generation’s (and my own) character to the character of the fading “senior” generation. There is a reason that our seniors have been named “America’s Greatest Generation.”  Many in their generation were born during or shortly after the Great Depression.  They fought the Nazi’s in WWII, and then came home to start thousands of small businesses across our country. They eventually restored our economy and the general welfare of the American people.  They are considered to be great because of what they accomplished for our country – but I’m learning that their accomplishments are a direct result of their character. They are hard working, honest, family oriented, loyal, patriotic, etc.  Essentially, America’s Greatest Generation has great character.

My generation does not display great character.  We do not display the same character, values, integrity, or work ethic that the senior generation is so well known for having.  We are self centered, self pleasing, and ignorant to say the least.  We have been appropriately nicknamed Generation “X-Box” because we are still living with our parents, playing video games until 3am and sleeping in instead of going to work on time.  As a whole, we view life as a game.  We lack character.  Here are a few thoughts to compare the two generations.

-They created their destiny, we feel entitled to ours.

-They respect authority, we ignore ours.

-They have values based on tradition; we shop around to see what feels best.

-They are grateful to have a job, we are irritated by ours.

-They have invested, served, protected and provided for us.

-We have dishonored, disrespected, criticized and complained about them.

They have CHARACTER, we are just a bunch of characters.

To those of you who (like me) have not lived up to the standards set by the previous generation – this is OUR time to rise to the occasion. This is not the time to back down, let go, or coast.  This is our chance to lead our families and our nation by becoming men and women of honor, courage, and CHARACTER.

To those of you who have displayed great character – Thank You for leading the way.  You are a great example and I hope that one day I can be more like you.  Your faithfulness to God, scripture, family, values, and integrity go farther that you’ll ever know.  You deserve to be honored, appreciated, and respected.  I am watching you, learning from you, and I am inspired by the efforts you’ve made to stay committed to your values.  Thank You!

4 Things I LOVED about Spring Retreat 2011

1. Many of our students (even those who typically do not engage in “spiritual things”) pursued God at a deeper level.

I was blown away by how many of our teenagers responded to God this weekend.  We saw middle and high schoolers make decisions to follow Jesus for the first time, others who felt a calling to ministry for the first time, and even more who had defining moments in their spiritual walk.  I have received numerous emails from parents who say their children are different and more committed to their personal spiritual growth after their experience at the retreat.  One of our activities included identifying and eliminating  ”obstacles” to our spiritual growth.  Numerous teenagers have responded by decreasing their usage of facebook, text messaging, and video games in order to have more face time with God.  Other students immediately broke up with boyfriends and severed other relationships because they had become obstacles to their personal growth.  Overall, the majority of our students took their relationship with God to the next level. And as a youth pastor, THAT NEVER GETS OLD.

2. I saw our teenagers form friendships that would not have been formed otherwise.

One of the areas in our student ministry that can use improvement is the number of opportunities for fellowship.  Almost everything we do is very structured and purposed toward Bible Study, small group, large group teaching, spiritual growth, etc.  There is rarely an opportunity for our teens to simply hang out and get to know each other without an agenda.  This will change.  This weekend I really felt like God showed me that our students are starving to get to know one another.  One of the camp rules was that campers weren’t allowed to take cell phones, IPOD’s, laptops, etc.  At first I didn’t like this rule because these devices play such an important role in youth culture. However, I was amazed to see how this generation that is so connected can also be so lonely.  If there was one highlight or moment where God spoke to me, it was when I felt nudged to increase opportunities for our teenagers to fellowship (hangout, etc) with one another.

3. I made new friends.

I delegated as much responsibility as I could to others so that I could interact one-on-one with EVERY camper at some point during the retreat.  As a result, I was able to get to know our students better because I wasn’t overloaded with responsibility.  I am so grateful for the meaningful conversations and new friendships that I experienced with our students this past weekend.  I feel like I know our teenagers better, understand where many of them are on their faith journey, and I’m better equipped to help them get from where they are to where God wants them to be.

4. 6 of the 8 leaders who went to camp with us this year have NEVER been on a retreat with our students before.

We left our veteran youth leaders at home this past weekend.  Initially, that worried me.  However, I believe our newest leaders gained confidence and had the opportunity to take ownership over our youth ministry. It was really good for our veteran leaders to take a break, they have worked so hard and deserve so much more than just a break.  It was also great for our newest leaders to feel free to unlock their leadership potential and run with it.   Additionally, it was healthy for our students to be exposed to new faces who are also committed to helping them on their faith-journey.

Overall, Spring Retreat 2011 was a HUGE success.  I couldn’t have asked for a better experience.  I believe that if God is going to do great things THROUGH our youth ministry, then he has do great thing IN our youth ministry first…at Spring Retreat 2011, I saw a glimpse of what God is doing IN us, and I can’t wait to see what God does THROUGH us as a result.

Don’t Eat The Honey

Judges 14:5-9

“As Samson and his parents were going down to Timnah, a young lion suddenly attacked Samson near the vineyards of Timnah. At that moment the Spirit of the Lord came powerfully upon him, and he ripped the lion’s jaws apart with his bare hands. He did it as easily as if it were a young goat. But he didn’t tell his father or mother about it. When Samson arrived in Timnah, he talked with the woman and was very pleased with her.  Later, when he returned to Timnah for the wedding, he turned off the path to look at the carcass of the lion. And he found that a swarm of bees had made some honey in the carcass. He scooped some of the honey into his hands and ate it along the way. He also gave some to his father and mother, and they ate it. But he didn’t tell them he had taken the honey from the carcass of the lion.”

The story of Samson is very popular. He is a man with great potential. He was set aside by God for great purposes and was given a great gift of strength. Samson was a beast in a mans body. His unbelievable strength was given to him by God.  He had a gift.  A special ability.  Strength. So much strength, in fact, that he was able to kill a lion with his bare hands.

Samson also had a weakness. Externally, he was strong. Internally, he was weak. Samson, at times, lacked character. He had everything going for him on the outside.  He had talent, potential, and ability. He even had the long hair to show it! (Long hair was an outward sign of his commitment to God) The problem with Samson was that he lacked character. He didn’t do the right thing when he was alone.  As a Nazirite man, eating honey from the dead carcus of a lion made him ceremonially unclean.  Part of his Nazirite vow was to remain pure, clean, and set apart.

Samson displayed great ability in his strength to kill that lion; but it was his attraction to the honey on the carcus of his accomplishment that made him unclean. Sometimes the greatest threat to your character is the honey created  by your abilities. You are like Samson. You have amazing abilities. God has gifted you tremendously!  But if you examine your accomplishments closely you will see a small nest of honey that is potentially dangerous and toxic to your character.

Do your abilities take you to a level that your character is not ready for?  Are you ever tempted to eat the honey?  Do you become prideful because of your ablities?  What is your honey?  Self-Centeredness?  Greed?  Arrogance?  Sometimes these temptations are most attractive shortly after you accomplish great things.  What is the honey that has nestled itself in the carcus of your greatest accomplishments?

There is no question that your gifts and abilities will take you to great heights. The question is, can your character sustain you?