I was a youth pastor for 3 years, and I’ve been a “lead” pastor for 4 years. So, I’ve been in “full time” ministry now for 7 years. And if there is ONE thing that has stood out to me over these 7 years, it’s the reality that MEN DON’T DO CHURCH.
I read somewhere that 25% of MARRIED women who go to church, go alone. That’s a hard pill to swallow!! But I’ve seen it…
I can specifically remember, when I was I youth pastor, standing in the parking lot on a Sunday evening as 150 teenagers were dropped off for church on a Sunday night. And out of 150 kids, who were dropped off, only ONE of the kids was dropped off by their Dad. Every other driver that night was a female.
I can also specifically remember a time when a whole bunch of women from my church were on a retreat together over the weekend, and HARDLY anyone came to church on Sunday morning because (I’m assuming) all the Dads saw that as an opportunity to stay home for the day instead of bringing the kids to church.
Now these might be random occurrences, but in general I think these are indicators that men just don’t do church.
And I get it. I understand why you don’t do church. You have priorities. You work really hard all week, you spend Saturday getting stuff done around the house, and Sunday is your ONLY day to chill out, drink beer and watch football!!
PLUS, church just isn’t relevant to you, right? I mean, why would any man want to get dressed up and spend a couple of hours singing girly love songs to a long haired, middle eastern man who he’s never actually met before? And when the message of the church is “love, love, love, you’re so special, God has special plans for you, etc it kinda makes you wanna run away and go kill an animal or build something with your hands.
WHEN was the last time you ever heard a message from the Pastor about things that ACTUALLY matter to you… work, sex, money, family, or marriage. And even if the pastor DID talk about those things, you probably wouldn’t want to hear his perspective because he’s just some soft, sheltered guy wearing a sweater vest who has never experienced the real world, doesn’t have a “real job,” and if the two of you went to high school together, you probably would have beat him up after school!! Am I right??!!
So, why am I writing this?
The church has tried to get you to “sit still and listen.” But I see Oasis as a place where you can laugh, tell jokes, and have fun. Men have a lot of “acquaintances,” but few brothers. I see Oasis becoming a brotherhood. Many men are empty and weak, using all kinds of things to fill the emptiness…But I see Oasis as a place where men can be FILLED with life and learn to be strong again. The church has tried to get you to “be nice,” but I see Oasis as a place where men like you can be great.
I want to invite you to be a part of this.
A church where a man can be a man. A place where you’ll hear some rock and roll every once in a while, where you don’t have to walk on ice for fear of someone over hearing a bad word slip out of your mouth, where you can be real, strengthened by a band of brothers, and inspired by a message about things that actually matter to you.
So this Sunday, wake your butt up. Get out of bed, help your wife get the kids ready, and get to church at Oasis. We promise we will do our best not to bore you to death, waste your time, force you do girly things, ask you for your money, or make you dress up.
Love you, bro.